Warm-Up Day 2: The Heart and Mouth Connection

"What you say flows from what is in your heart."   Luke 6:45b (NLT)

Sure, I can recite this verse word-for-word. 

But how seriously do I live it day-to-day?

I mean, really: Do I real-ize that my words broadcast to other people exactly what's happening in my heart?

Just last Friday, I was fuming at my computer, about to yell, "You stupid piece of garbage!" at the top of my lungs when there came a knock on my door. 

One of my students. 

Whew!  

Close call, that time! Good thing she came when she did, eh?

Or was it?

Was I "saved" by the fact that I didn't actually say anything out loud? That nobody actually heard me verbalize what I was already thinking?

What I Hear...

In her book For Men Only (Yes, I read it; please don't tell on me!), Shaunti Feldhahn quotes a woman from her survey saying, "women are truly verbal and can't help it....the things [people] say to us are in mental tape archives and are as real today as they were the moment they were spoken."

I don't know about you, but this sure hit home for me! 

For almost a quarter of a century, my husband has wondered why I purposely rehearse painful conversations in my mind, re-evoking old emotions. 

I don't do it on purpose. It's just that as a woman, so often what I hear I take to heart. 

And scripture is crystal clear:  What what I take to heart comes out my mouth.

Who Hears Me Most?

I agree that we need to watch our words because of the impact we have on others. 

Especially on non-believers. 

Especially on our spouses and children.

But I'm not "saved" from the consequences of my complaining+ when my words stay unspoken. 

Whether I hear my words aloud or I "just" hear them in my mind: 

One person takes the full brunt of every single complain-y, critical, gossipy, and sarcastic comment that goes through my mind:

Me.

(complaining+ = complaining, criticizing, gosipping, and sarcasm)

Q4U:  

Leave a comment to be entered into this week's drawing for a copy of Dangerous Surrender: What Happens When You Say "Yes" to God by Kay Warren!

• What does Luke 6:45 say to you?

• From what you hear–spoken and unspoken–what do you especially take to heart?

The PURSE-onality Challenge: 31 days of replacing "baditude" with God's Word and Gratitude! 

Click here for more details!

Warm-Up Week, Day 1: What's Wrong With It?

Warm Up Day 1: What’s Wrong With It?

Welcome to Warm-Up Week!  From April 22-30, we're getting ready for The PURSE-onality Challenge which starts May 1st. 

In the last few days, you’ve likely heard (or said!) something like

• “The cashier took forever to ring up my groceries! I could have done it in half the time with one hand and bagged them all with the other!”

• “Were you born in a barn? This room looks like a pigsty!”

• “She’s says she’s not coming because of her kids’ sports schedule…"

• (Yelled to the driver who has just cut in front) “Is your car not equipped with a turn signal or are you too incompetent to use it?”

No big deal.

Right?

I mean, what’s wrong with a little Complaining? 

Or some well-deserved Criticism?

Or a wee bit of Gossip? 

Or witty Sarcasm?

Loosen up!

Right?

Be real: 31 days with no complaining, no criticism, no gossip, and no sarcasm?

Aren’t we taking this a bit too seriously?!?

God Takes Talk Seriously

In the NIV, Ephesians 4:29 says “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up, according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” 

In the NLT, it says, “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”

The KJV says, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."

If you're at all like me, you might be thinking:

• "But half my conversations are complaining." 

• "I just speak my mind."

• "That’s so limiting! "

• "If I followed these 'suggestions', I’d have to stop talking altogether!"

Don’t Believe God? Ask Amazon.

Let’s browse the Self-Help section. 

If complaining+ really is a useful relationship skill, then surely we’ll find dozens of books telling us how to do it better, right?

Perhaps we can order up a copy of...

These titles aren't available?

Maybe they’re temporarily sold out!

They don’t even exist?

Oh.

Here’s What’s Wrong

Here’s why we don't find how-to books about becoming a better complainer:

Complaining+ 
Does. 
Not. 
Work.

(complaining+ = complaining, criticizing, gosipping, and sarcasm)

Q4U:  


Leave a comment to be entered into this week's drawing for a copy of Dangerous Surrender: What Happens When You Say "Yes" to God by Kay Warren!

• What does Ephesians 4:29 say to you?

• Which do you think will be the hardest for you to stop: Complaining, Criticism, Gossip, or Sarcasm? Why?

The PURSE-onality Challenge: 31 days of replacing "baditude" with God's Word and Gratitude! 


Click here for more details!