A high school friend recently tagged me in this photo on Facebook.
I showed Daniel and he said, “Oh, you were so cute!”
My first thought, however, was “Oh. My. Goodness. I didn’t realize it started that long ago!”
“It” being my tendency to control.
Can’t you just hear my body language shouting, “I am playing with this doll stroller, and I’m not sharing!”
Notice the diaper bag slung strategically cross-wise over my body so that nobody can even think about taking it from me?
See that determined jaw-set and “my-way-or-the-high-way” smolder in those eyes?
I’m not sure whether to be relieved that my controlling tendencies aren’t something I concocted in high school or dismayed that they’ve been with me since birth!
I’m participating in the Online Bible Study of Karen Ehman‘s Let. It. Go.: How to Stop Running the Show and Start Walking in Faith. Over the last year, God’s been opening my eyes to the myriad ways I attempt to protect myself through inappropriate control of people and circumstances. My hope is to keep learning and surrendering.
After all, my so-called “control” is nothing but an illusion in the first place. But oh, the time, energy, and emotion I’ve poured into trying to make it real!
Your Turn:
- In what way(s) do you wrestle with control issues?
- When you look back at childhood photos, what do you see that surprises you…or doesn’t surprise you?
- Anything else on your heart!

